ازاى تحافظ على حماسك/اهتمامك للحياة

"A man must be prepared to give 100% to his purpose, fulfill his karma or dissolve it, and then let go

of that specific form of living. 

He must be capable of not knowing what to do with his life, entering a period of

unknowingness and waiting for a vision or a new form of purpose to

emerge. These cycles of strong specific action followed by periods of not

knowing what the hell is going on are natural for a man who is shedding layers of karma in his relaxation into truth.

As you open yourself to living at your edge, your deepest purpose will slowly begin to make

itself known. In the meantime, you will experience layer after layer of purposes, each one getting closer

and closer to the fullness of your deepest purpose. It is as if your deepest purpose is at the center of your

being, and it is surrounded by layers of concentric circles, each circle being a lesser purpose. Your life

consists of penetrating each circle, from the outside toward the center.

The outer purposes are often the purposes you have inherited or learned from your parents and

your childhood experiences. Perhaps your father was a fireman, so you wanted to be a fireman. Or, in

reaction to him, you've decided to be an arsonist. In any case, the outer circles, the purposes you often

apply yourself too early in life, are most likely only distant approximations of your deepest purpose.

If your deepest purpose is to meditate and realize God, you might find that before you can

totally dedicate yourself to this practice you must work your way through the concentric circles of

playing with sexual partners, using drugs, getting married, raising children, developing a career, and

finally, having dissolved your fascination and need to do all of that, getting down to the business of full-time meditation.

As you dissolve each layer and move toward the center, you will more and more be living from

your deeper purposes, and then your deepest heart purpose, whatever that is, in every moment.

However, you probably are not living your deepest purpose yet. You probably need to burn off the

karma, or fulfill the need, of the present purpose by which you are fascinated and distracted.

It's easy to feel disappointed by life; success is never as fulfilling as you think it is going to be.

But there is a reason for this. Successfully completing a lesser purpose doesn't feel very good for very

long, because it is simply preparation for advancing toward a greater embodiment of your deeper

purpose. Each purpose, each mission, is meant to be fully lived to the point where it becomes empty,

boring, and useless. Then it should be discarded. This is a sign of growth, but you may mistake it for a

sign of failure.

For instance, you may take on a business project, work at it for several years, and then suddenly

find yourself totally disinterested. You know that if you stayed with it for another few years you would

reap much greater financial reward than if you left the project now. But the project no longer calls you.

You no longer feel interested in the project. You have developed skills over the last few years working

on the project, but it hasn't yet come to fruition. You may wonder, now that you have the skills, should

you stick with it and bring the project to fruition, even though the work feels empty to you?

Well, maybe you should stick with it. Maybe you are bailing out too soon, afraid of success or

failure, or just too lazy to persevere. This is one possibility. Ask your close men friends if they feel you

are simply losing steam, wimping out, or afraid to bring your project to completion. If they feel you are

bailing out too soon, stick with it.

However, there is also the possibility that you have completed your karma in this area. It is

possible that this was one layer of purpose, which you have now fulfilled, on the way to another layer of purpose, closer to your deepest purpose.

Among the signs of fulfilling or completing a layer of purpose are these:

1. You suddenly have no interest whatsoever in a project or mission that, just previously,

motivated you highly.

2. You feel surprisingly free of any regrets whatsoever, for starting the project or for

ending it.

3. Even though you may not have the slightest idea of what you are going to do next, you

feel clear, unconfused, and, especially, unburdened.

4. You feel an increase in energy at the prospect of ceasing your involvement with the

project.

5. The project seems almost silly, like collecting shoelaces or wallpapering your house

with gas station receipts. Sure, you could do it, but why would you want to?

If you experience these signs, it is probably time to stop working on this project. You must end

your involvement impeccably, however, making sure there are no loose ends and that you do not

burden anybody's life by stopping your involvement. This might take some time, but it is important that

this layer of your purpose ends cleanly and does not create any new karma, or obligation, that will

burden you or others in the future.

The next layer of your unfolding purpose may make itself clear immediately. More often,

however, it does not. After completing one layer of purpose, you might not know what to do with your

life. You know that the old project is over for you, but you are not sure of what is next. At this point, you

must wait for a vision.

There is no way to rush this process. You may need to get an intermediary job to hold you over

until the next layer of purpose makes itself clear. Or, perhaps you have enough money to simply wait.

But in any case, it is important to open yourself to a vision of what is next. You stay open to a vision of

your deeper purpose by not filling your time with distractions. Don't watch TV or play computer games.

Don't go out drinking beer with your friends every night or start dating a bunch of women. Simply wait.

You may wish to go on a retreat in a remote area and be by yourself. Whatever it is you decide to do,

consciously keep yourself open and available to receiving a vision of what is next. It will come.

When it comes, it usually won't be a detailed vision. You will probably have a sense of what

direction to move in, but the practical steps might not make themselves clear. When the impulse begins

to arise, act on it. Don't wait for the details. Learn by trial and error what it is you are to do.

For instance, perhaps you were a stockbroker and then finished that particular layer of purpose.

You saved up some money, so now you are waiting for a vision of your next layer. After three weeks of going crazy, not knowing what you are going to do with your life, you begin to feel that you want to

work with people. You begin to fantasize about using your financial skills to help people set up their

own businesses. You have a few friends who have great intentions to save the world, but they are lousy

businessmen and can't seem to get off the ground. So you call them and offer your help.

As you help them, you continually feel for the "groove" of your purpose. You might have a

few false starts. But, eventually, you find that dozens of non-profit groups are telephoning you, asking

for your advice. It feels as if the universe is supporting you in this direction. You have no idea whether

you can earn a living doing this, but it feels right for now. So you apply yourself fully to it. You give

your gift i00%, without holding anything back.

Soon, a wealthy man finds out about what you are doing. He admires your total commitment

and your orientation to serve others. He becomes your patron. Now, you are set. You have a good

income, you are doing what you really want to do, and you are helping others. You love what you do,

so you generate love in those who come in contact with you. Your life feels full.

And then, one day, a few years later, it is finished. This layer has dissolved. And the cycle

begins again, and again, until you have penetrated all the layers into your deepest purpose. Then, you act fully, until that purpose, too, is dissolved in the bliss of the love that you are." 

          ~  David Deida, The Way of the Superior Man